This Filipino slang term was christened with another meaning this year when a popular TikTok user, Justine Luzares, portrayed a typical chismosa neighbor. Clothed in a robe and a towel on her head, “Marites” spread rumors and tales. And thus, the term chismosang Marites spread as far and as fast as rumors go.
With how easily information is spread online and offline, the term now became synonymous with someone who spreads gossip- especially about famous celebrities. Are you one of them?
While everyone likes to share juicy information from time to time, it’s best not to go overboard. It’s one thing to gossip, but it’s another story when you spread serious accusations. So here are a few tips to know if you’re doing it right.
But First, Are You Becoming A Marites?
You Live For Drama
You’re always on social media, looking at trends. And when you find the latest piece of juicy information, you can’t wait to gobble it up and then post it on your own social channels. Plus, you’re always updated with the latest developments and can’t wait to give your own take.
But be careful in adding your opinion to such a juicy piece of information. You may be “spilling the tea” today, and tomorrow you could easily be spilled with it.
You Can’t Wait To Share What You Find
Another way to know that you’re becoming a Marites is when as soon as you hear a secret or chismis, you start coming up with a list of who to tell. In fact, social media has made it easy to tell a secret with just one tap.
If a friend confides in you, make sure to be worthy of that trust. It takes a few minutes to spread a secret, but it may take a lifetime to regain one’s broken trust.
You Have A Hard Time Finding Other Topics of Conversation
When you have developed a habit of talking about other people’s business, you may find that you don’t know what else to talk about. Talking about other people is one of the easiest ice breakers. So you may need to dig deep to avoid turning that into a habit.
Family and Friends Stop Sharing With You
When you finally earn a reputation as a chismosang Marites, you may find that your family and friends have stopped confiding in you. Talking about someone else is all fun and games until you start burning bridges.
But Psychologists say gossiping is a social skill. According to experts, gossiping is not inherently bad. In fact, it plays a crucial role in our society.
How To Know If You’re Doing It Right
So How Do You Become A Good Marites?
Be someone who people can trust with information and use it responsibly. Say, for example, your friend wants to buy something from a certain shop with a bad reputation. You let your friend know, not to sully the shop’s reputation, but as a means to warn your friend about spending their money on them.
The key is sharing information to help others. When you gossip with the intent to help others or out of concern for others, it has positive, social effects.
When Does Gossip Becomes Harmful?
Gossip becomes harmful when you share information with malicious intent. When you use the information to get ahead or to take advantage of someone. Sometimes, bad gossip is driven by a reckless urge to spread information just because you can.
Say, for example, you let your entire circle of friends know that your friend is currently facing financial difficulties. You did so, not because you want to help, but because you’re judging their lifestyle.
Is it Worth It Becoming A Marites?
There are plenty of reasons why people gossip. Sometimes, it’s just fun to talk about the latest piece of juicy information – especially when it involves celebrities. It gives us a fleeting, feel-good moment. A few laughs at most.
But whether it’s because it serves as a distraction from your own life or you like giving your hot take on the latest news, it’s best to be careful. You’ll feel worse after spreading the gossip, at worst- you may end up facing a libel case.